The transitional age is a difficult stage not only in the life of a teenager, but also of his Parents counseling. At this moment, the child is experiencing serious shocks, begins to recognize himself as a part of society, tests the strength of previously learned truths and searches for the purpose of life. As a result, he pushes close people away, becomes conflicted and aggressive, so that not all parents can keep the thread that connects them and maintain mutual understanding in the family.
This is why adults may need professional help. So, psychological for Parents counseling of adolescents sets itself one single task – the search for optimal tactics for communicating with a problem child.
Features of working with parents of teenagers
Parents counseling of adolescents to be effective enough, the work of a specialist must be based on several unshakable principles. In particular, the psychologist should:
- take into account the age of the child and the characteristics of his development (in the social, intellectual, emotional and sexual spheres);
- evaluate the situation from the point of view of a teenager (look at what is happening through his eyes);
- pay attention to the situation within the family (whether there are problems between spouses);
- take into account genetic predispositions, cultural traditions and difficulties that arose in the child’s past.
When need of parents counseling ?
If parents want to establish warm contact with the child, eliminate emerging conflicts and establish intra-family interaction, they will also have to solve several of their own problems. This list includes:
- Over-demanding (excellent student’s syndrome). We are talking about people who strive not to make mistakes in raising children, and if they occur, they experience a huge sense of guilt. Such parents perceive every mistake of a teenager at their own expense, and therefore experience tremendous stress.
- Low self-esteem. We are talking about people who take care of the child solely in order to prove their own worth and value. Their upbringing turns into total control, and the teenager seeks to free himself from such custody, which causes daily conflicts and confrontations.
- Violation of the role structure. We are talking about families in which parents shift responsibility to older children (for example, caring for a younger brother or sister). As a result, the child pushes aside his own desires and “earns” numerous internal conflicts.
Stages of work and stages of psychological assistance to parents of a teenager
The help of a psychologist to parents of adolescents consists of several stages, to each of which the specialist must pay sufficient attention. Adhering to this algorithm, a professional is able not only to understand the current situation, but also to find the best way to solve the problem step by step.
Parents counseling starts with collecting and analyzing information received at the first meeting with parents. We are talking about the social situation in the family, the number of its members and their interests, plans for the future and existing problems. In some cases, a specialist can request information about the child’s health from medical institutions, ask about his successes and failures in school.
An additional plus will be the opportunity to communicate with the child directly, to conduct a psychological examination of the teenager. Better yet, observe his behavior in natural conditions.
At this stage, it is very important to establish a connection between the doctor and the patient. Not only the child, but also his parents should feel a friendly and attentive attitude from the psychologist – then they can trust him and his opinion.
After that, the specialist will have to analyze the collected information, get to the bottom of the problem and explain to Parents their mistakes. It is very important that adults adequately perceive the indication of inconsistency in their behavior, contradictions in upbringing and building a system of values. Only in this way will they be able to look at the child’s relationship from the outside and realize the current situation in the family.
As a result of the work done of parents counseling , parents should get rid of their fears, shame and guilt for the child’s behavior. Now that the problem has lost its additional emotional “coloring”, adults can find the strength to face the real problem and become a real support for the teenager (regardless of his behavior).
Psychological assistance to parents of adolescents in the “Assistance” Center
Specialists of the “Assistance” Center are ready at any time to accept parents who experience difficulties in communicating with their child. Experienced psychologists will analyze the current situation in the family, relieve you of fears and stress, and help you find the best way out of the situation.